The Saddest Letterbox in Christendom

Hello. I’m Jen Storer’s letterbox and I am the saddest letterbox in Christendom.

Why?

Well, look at me!

Here’s another angle in case you need convincing:

Right.

Enough with personifying the letterbox.

Or anthropomorphising a tin box…

Whatevs

Lockdown is a biatch, yeah?

So I have a new project.

It’s called ‘Lockdown Letterbox’.

I have taken my miserable letterbox down to the Witchy Cottage and I’m giving it a makeover. Not the cottage. The letterbox! Shessh. Keep up, okay?

Ahem.

Yes. After THREE years of waiting for the House Fairies to deliver a new letterbox, I have taken matters into my own hands.

I can’t go to Bunnings or any other place else that sells letterboxes so I am pimping the shit out of this one.

I told Himself that when I’m done we will be on the front page of the local newspaper.

Most Astonishing Letterbox in The Shire.

Or something like that.

Lockdown, you drove me to it.

I’ll share a pic when I’m done. Watch this space!!

In Other News.

(Or, My Life in Dotty Dot Points…)

• I just finished bingeing on The Innocents (Netflix). This show takes shapeshifting to a whole new level, dear reader. People accidentally (and intentionally) mutating into other peeps (friends, family and rando people on the street) and getting into all sorts of hairy predicaments. It was good! And Guy Pearce. He’s cool, yeah? And really good at doing CREEPY!

• Last week, I had that weird experience of ‘there is NOTHING to feckin read in this entire feckin house! And I can’t go the library or the bookshop because LOCKDOWN!’ Then I thought, maybe there’s something in the bookcase that I’ve been meaning to read? Something I’ve been meaning to read for about , oh I don’t know, TWENTY years?

And yes! I found this!

OMG! It’s WONDERFUL!!!!

You’ve probably read it? I bet you’re rolling your eyes, saying, sweet Jaysus, Jen, get with the programme.

Yeah. Thought so.

Sigh.

What else?

• I finished some little stories and sent ’em to my publisher. A wing and a prayer, dear reader, a wing and a prayer. It’s always scary. Always makes one feel vulnerable and wonky. These were Junior Fiction stories, perhaps my favourite kidlit category of all. I’m going to run the Junior Fiction e-course again in November. It’s always popular and super FUN!

• We opened The Duck Pond on Sunday and have welcomed in a GAGGLE, FLOCK, PRIDE of new duckies—and we’re still welcoming them in as I write. We’re open until August 30! I cannot tell you how much I LOVE this community and LOVE where it’s headed. I see such a shiny future for it! Mirror, mirror and all that!

• Meantime, Harry has gone all Madonna-ish and painterly pensive.

But he doesn’t fool me.

He’s still a pound kitty from the wrong side of the tracks.

• And lastly, I posted a pic of me in my Trap Door t-shirt on Instagram. And what do you know? It seems there are LOADS of rabid TD Fans out there in our community!

That makes me weirdly and spookily and blue thing happy!!!

‘Feed me, Berk!!!‘

Bye for now, dear reader.

Thank you for sticking with this dotty ramble!

Until next time

Jen xo

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